Inter-racial Marriage

On Monday I got a pleasant visit by an old time friend Nisa. She told me she just got married and is currently 3-month pregnant. Of course the first question was "where's your husband from?" She said "I am in a similar situation with you because I married a foreigner".

So, that was the reason for her visit, to get "an expert" opinion and advice. Hahaha. Well, marrying a foreigner is not as simple as it looks, especially in Malaysia where laws and rules are male-biased. When we were first married, we received all kind of "advice" from those who have no experience whatsoever with inter-racial marriage! Not to mention the sarcastic remarks from those with authority. I was thinking "if one of these days your daughter meets and marry a foreigner, you will find out how I feel". Some of them said, "why can't you marry a Malay man?" or "a wife should be where the husband is". That's right! My husband wants to be in Malaysia, so I must stay in this country and just give me the necessary papers!

Alhamdulillah, after 13 years of waiting (patiently) and after 5 kids , 4 applications, 4 rejections and 4 appeals later, we finally received the long awaited PR card. So my advice to my friend Nisa, and whoever wants to do what I did, be PATIENT. One more thing, if you want your kids to have Malaysian citizenship, never ever deliver them outside of the country. Once you do that your kids will automatically follow their father's citizenship. But if you are a Malaysian male, the situation is totally different.

Marriage

During fasting month, all the workers at my College get to go home at 4.30pm which is half an hour earlier than our regular time. I bet some people are envious of that, especially those who never leave their office until the sun has completely set. Anyway, as soon as my watch turned 4.30pm, I switched off my computer, packed my bag, and walked out of my office. Then I saw two lecturers sitting in the room across from mine, so I asked them why they were still there. Apparently, they were waiting for their roommate who had to teach until 5pm. Since both of them are new comers, I decided to get to know them for a few minutes.

During our conversation, a topic of marriage came up. I said I was married a bit late (at the age of 28). Then they seemed worried and asked me whether 28 is really too late to get married. I told them that it is not late per say, but you will feel it when you see your friend’s kids are already in college while yours are still wearing diapers. However, if you are not concerned about things like that, it really doesn’t matter anyway. After all, getting married isn’t that simple. You have to have a partner whom you are going to marry. Hopefully, you meet someone who will go through thick and thin with you. Thank God I don’t have to go through the journey of finding Mr. Right anymore.